How to Prepare for a Natural Birth: What I Wish I'd Known

Holistic Motherhood, Movement & Recovery, Wild Roots Blog

By Madeleine Gray, RN · Wild Roots Blog

How do you prepare for a natural birth? Get your body moving and strong, practice your breath, learn to let your pelvic floor fully release, choose a support team that knows what helps you, and rehearse your comfort tools at home. And let go of the need to control how it goes.

I planned a home birth. I ended up having my baby in the hospital. And honestly, I got to see both sides of it, which I wouldn't change. What I learned is that preparing for birth isn't about controlling how it goes. It's about showing up with a body that's ready, a mind that's calm, and a team that knows you.

So here's how I think about it, as a nurse, a trainer, and a mom. I work with pregnant women in Austin, TX, and these are the same pieces I walk them through.

Quick note: this is education, not medical advice. Your OB or midwife knows your health history, so check with them before you start or change anything, especially exercise.

At a glance

• Move every day. Walking, squats, and hip circles keep your hips and pelvis moving well.
• Practice slow breathing when you are calm, so it is there when you need it.
• Learn to relax your pelvic floor, not just squeeze it.
• Choose your support people and tell them what helps you.
• Write a flexible birth preferences list and practice your comfort tools at home.

How do I get my body ready for a natural birth?

Move every day. Walking, squats, and hip circles keep your hips and pelvis moving well. You don't need a perfect workout. You need to move.

Practice your breathing. A slow breath in through your nose, a long breath out. Do it when you're calm, because that's the only time you can really learn it. When the day comes, it's already there for you.

Build strength where birth asks for it. Legs, glutes, back, and core. This is the work I do with my prenatal clients, and it's a big part of why I do it. You can read how I think about training in How I Train Postpartum. The same ideas of breath and pelvic floor first carry through pregnancy too.

Rest and nourish. Sleep, water, protein, and mineral-rich foods. Your body is doing a huge job. I wrote a whole post on the minerals every mama needs if you want to go deeper.

Why does letting go matter for birth?

Learn to relax your pelvic floor, not just squeeze it. Everyone talks about kegels. But letting go matters just as much as strength. A pelvic floor that can fully release is part of how your body makes room for a baby.

And letting go is just as important in your mind, which is exactly what I learned in my own birth. Letting go is the most consistent theme in my life. I'm a Virgo, I get fixated easily, and I've held onto things for too long. I was surprised to discover that things showed up in my birth process because I wasn't surrendering fully. Our bodies hold what our minds won't release, and birth has a way of bringing it to the surface. Practicing surrender before the big day, in your breath and in your pelvic floor, is some of the best prep I know.

How do I choose a birth team and support people?

Choose your support people, and tell them what helps you. Don't assume they know. Tell your partner or doula what you want to hear, what you don't, and how you like to be touched or left alone.

Here's my honest take. If I had thought about this, I would have chosen a different midwife. I didn't feel coached enough during my birth, and that's on me, because we never spent much time going over what I would need in a moment of intensity. I couldn't have known exactly what it would feel like, but I love an intense workout, so I can compare it to that. And in an intense workout, I love a firm push. That's something I would have changed in my home birth, and it's something I could have told my team ahead of time. Ryan did the best he could with what we knew at the time. Nobody ever taught us to have this conversation, so now I teach it. Before the big day, ask yourself what helps you when things get hard, and say it out loud to the people in the room.

Learn the stages of labor. When each stage feels familiar, it feels less scary.

Write a one-page birth preferences list, and stay flexible. I mean it on the flexible part. Mine didn't go the way I pictured, and it was still wonderful.

Ask your provider real questions. What are your intervention rates? When would you suggest changing the plan? What can I do to move around in labor? A good provider will be glad you asked.

What comfort tools do women use in a natural birth?

Practice your comfort tools at home. Breath, positions, music, warm water. Try them before you need them. Many women use:

• Changing positions: hands and knees, side lying, standing and leaning, a birth ball
• Warm water, like a shower or tub, if your birth place offers it
• Counter-pressure and massage on your lower back and hips
• Breath and low sounds, with a soft jaw and soft shoulders
• Dim lights, quiet, and privacy
• A support person who knows your plan

And you're allowed to change your mind about pain relief at any time. Talk through your options with your provider ahead of time so there are no surprises.

What if my birth doesn't go to plan?

Every birth is different. You can do everything \"right\" and still end up somewhere you didn't plan. That isn't a failure, and it isn't on you. The information gap is real, and most of us were never taught any of this. Preparing is how you walk in feeling capable instead of scared.

If you're a busy woman running a business or a team, and you're wondering where birth prep fits in your life, start small. Five minutes of breathing. One walk. One question written down for your next appointment. That's enough to begin.

I work with pregnant women one on one in Austin, TX. We build strength, practice breath and pelvic floor work, and get you ready for the real thing, with baby welcome at sessions. Book an intro session and we'll start where you are. You can also reach out on IG or book a free consult with me.

Educational only. Not a substitute for care from your own OB or midwife.

Frequently asked questions

Q: Is it safe to exercise during pregnancy to prepare for birth?

A: For most women with uncomplicated pregnancies, regular physical activity is encouraged by major obstetric guidelines. Your OB or midwife knows your health history, so check with them before you start or change anything.

Q: Should I do kegels to prepare for labor?

A: Strength matters, but so does the release. I teach women to practice a full relaxation after every lift, because a pelvic floor that can let go is part of making room for baby. If you have pain or leaking, a pelvic floor physical therapist can check you in person.

Q: Do I need a doula or a support person?

A: Many women find a steady support person helpful, and research on continuous labor support is encouraging. What matters most is that they know what helps you, so tell them ahead of time.

Q: How do I practice breathing for labor?

A: Try a slow breath in through your nose and a long breath out, once or twice a day when you are calm. Add a soft jaw and soft shoulders. The more familiar it is, the easier it is to find when things feel intense.

Q: Can I change my mind about pain relief during labor?

A: Yes, at any time. Talk through your options with your provider ahead of time so you know what is available where you plan to give birth.

Sources

1. American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists. Physical Activity and Exercise During Pregnancy and the Postpartum Period. Committee Opinion No. 804, 2020.
2. Bohren, M. A., Hofmeyr, G. J., Sakala, C., Fukuzawa, R. K., & Cuthbert, A. (2017). Continuous support for women during childbirth. Cochrane Database of Systematic Reviews.